Dying Matters: chance to create a lasting dedication to loved ones
For one month only, anyone who has lost a loved one and has a connection to our hospitals is being invited to create a lasting tribute to them to mark Dying Matters Month.
Dedications will be added to a hand-painted silver birch in the Bereavement Suite Family Room at Queen’s Medical Centre.
The messages will be etched onto wooden leaves and fastened to the tree at the end of the month, with a public unveiling planned for the future.
“The silver birch is a symbol of beginning anew, growth, courage and protection; ours represents those that have had to begin anew following a bereavement, and find a way to grow through their grief,” said Hannah Hall, Medical Examiner Officer. “The person doesn’t have to have died in May, but submissions can only be made this month.”
Hannah thanked the NUH Pantomime for funding the tree – the final touch to the new, welcoming Bereavement Suite.
“The Bereavement Service was on A-floor but the Family Room was on D-floor - it really wasn’t working at all. We wanted everything to be in one place, a Bereavement Services hub.”
The service works closely with GPs and covers community deaths as well as hospital death across the region and has an End of Life champion. And when the pandemic hit the UK in March 2020, the need for the service had never been greater.
“Our team played a vital role in COVID-19 mortality-related statistics and making sure that death certificates were done in a timely manner," said Hannah. "The need for a bigger, more comfortable, tailored space became more and more evident, and the Trust funded a new department.”
With the money raised themselves, and support from the Friends of the QMC charity and NUH Pantomime, the team furnished and decorated the room and created the tree.
The theme for this year’s Dying Matters Month is The Way We Talk About Dying Matters, and focuses on the language used around death and dying – specifically between healthcare professionals and patients, carers, and families.
Open, timely conversations about dying are essential to good end of life care. But discomfort, lack of confidence, taboos around death, and confusion about who should be having these conversations means patients, carers and families may not understand what is happening, or get all the support they need.
Hannah said: “We can forget how stigmatised talking about death and dying can be. Families struggle to process it, no one wants to bring it up, and many people don’t know how to handle someone who is grieving.
“Talking about dying and using the correct terminology, which is death, dying, and bereavement – not passing on or passed away – means people can address grief in a healthier way and staff can learn how to work alongside death and grieving individuals and make sure the best thing happens for the bereaved and for the deceased patient.
“What we can offer the bereaved is 10 times better when we can talk openly about it. But if those conversations don’t take place, and a patient dies, it’s going to really affect that bereaved person’s experience.”
Submissions for the tree will close at the end of May – earlier if the maximum is reached before then. To request a dedication, just follow the link - The Birch Tree Campaign
Notes:
The Medical Examiners Service is a national system of specifically trained independent senior doctors employed in the NHS to provide support for bereaved families, improve patient safety and help adhere to the Learning from Deaths Policy.
It is their job to scrutinise the medical circumstances leading to death and ensure that cases are referred to the Coroner when necessary and that the content of the death certificate is accurate. The Medical Examiner's service also allows the bereaved next-of-kin to ask questions or raise concerns.
Since 2019, the Bereavement Service has experienced exponential changes in light of the new Medical Examiner’s system. Since its implementation, soon to be statutory in September of this year, our service has successfully employed a band of Medical Examiners, Medical Examiner officers, and amended the Bereavement service to a point that it is unrecognisable.